Feedback on 0.952
Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2016 2:29 am
Hey there! I've been playing through version 0.952. I'm only part of the way through, but since you requested feedback I've been taking notes, and I decided I should write up what I have so far. Overall, I'm impressed.
General comments:
--I like the way the visuals are done. It's got a cinematic feel that makes things interesting. I dig it.
--I like the way blurring is used in the backgrounds.
--I like the way each line of text turns gray as you progress.
--Good job everyone on the voice acting.
--I was confused about why, at the end of some lines of text, there's a file icon instead of an arrow. It took me a long time to figure out that it just signifies a new page/screen. I think that a simple icon that's a dot or square would be better.
--It's not clear at first the way color is used for other people speaking. This might be in part because the first one (Karl, on the boat) is red. I thought there might be some special, sinister significance, but that doesn't seem to be the case.
-- The text is a bit hard to read on some of the busier backgrounds.... although... they are very cool backgrounds, so I wouldn't necessarily want to see them covered by a darker text box. But I made note of it.
--When the first choice came up, I was confused, wondering why the text wasn't advancing, until I realized they were choices. Maybe more visual indication would be helpful.
--One of the Known Issues is musical cues, so I'm assuming music is unfinished. The lack of music in many scenes was conspicuous (although there are a few where silence would be appropriate). The lack of music/sound on the title screen is also kind of disconcerting. (I never even realized how much my brain is trained to expect to hear something.)
Bugs:
--The first time Reme appears, the boat in the background jumps.
--At the end of the docks scene with Salima, when the background transitions the transparency shows through.
--There's a typo after choosing to find post office: "dscend along both sides of the foyer"
--With Salima at the beach, starting with "as I approach a tree, about seven or eight meters away", a bright pixel appears in the upper center. It persists while the screen turns red until zoomed in ("Wh-what are you doing?"). (You know, I find myself very curious what caused a single pixel to go awry. )
--A couple pages of text overflow: when discussing the prescription for the cat ("Is he sick?"), when she gets home and is painting ("Letting out a sigh due to my broken concentration"), and some other points when talking to Karl (I didn't write down the lines).
Other thoughts I had as a played through:
--When we see Reme, the description says he "continues excitedly," but the way the line "Hey, I've been trying to get ahold of you..." is voice-acted doesn't sound that way. I like the way it was acted -- glad, but tinged with an intriguing concern/uncertainty... But it didn't quite jibe with the word "excitedly."
--The line "constant sound of gulls" is definitely in need of sound effects.
--When everything turns red around Salima, it's a neat visual. (Although I feel like there should be a sound effect to accompany it.)
--I feel like Elena's "verbal tick" should be audible. Not sure if that's doable as this point, but it's something I made note of. ^_^
--The first time at the flower shop after ringing the bell, Eva's sprite flashing for a second seemed like a bug. Maybe some up-down movement would help?
--I like the behind-the-counter sprites.
--near-by = nearby
--When Nina comes to the door with a crowbar, seeing her sprite gave me the impression that she came into the room. But then she asks to come in.
--With Salima at the beach, the zooming in with her sprite staying the same size is really cool. It seems okay for some of this scene to have no music.
--When talking about the fire, I think some fire imagery would be appropriate. Not necessarily a full background, but maybe some sort of overlay? Some more animation in this scene wouldn't hurt, either.
--I love the animation of the Salima sprite zipping out and in. Cool sound effect, too.
--I also love the animation of Nina drunk. The tilting to the side then correcting herself is perfect.
--After going out then returning to the boarding house, it's described as being very dark, with only a couple windows lit. This contradicts the background, in which all windows are lit.
--The music for this scene is slow and subdued, slowly building... which is good for the beginning, but once the cat is found, something more frantic should be playing. (The later part of this track is a bit more appropriate, though the faster part would need to be on loop.) As it is now, the mood doesn't seem right.
--Aw, Salima looks so cute with her hair down. (Though she looks cute with her hair up, as well.)
--Hey, when did the main menu background change?? Stealthy...
And that's as far as I've gotten. I hope this has been helpful. I'm happy to have backed this project.
General comments:
--I like the way the visuals are done. It's got a cinematic feel that makes things interesting. I dig it.
--I like the way blurring is used in the backgrounds.
--I like the way each line of text turns gray as you progress.
--Good job everyone on the voice acting.
--I was confused about why, at the end of some lines of text, there's a file icon instead of an arrow. It took me a long time to figure out that it just signifies a new page/screen. I think that a simple icon that's a dot or square would be better.
--It's not clear at first the way color is used for other people speaking. This might be in part because the first one (Karl, on the boat) is red. I thought there might be some special, sinister significance, but that doesn't seem to be the case.
-- The text is a bit hard to read on some of the busier backgrounds.... although... they are very cool backgrounds, so I wouldn't necessarily want to see them covered by a darker text box. But I made note of it.
--When the first choice came up, I was confused, wondering why the text wasn't advancing, until I realized they were choices. Maybe more visual indication would be helpful.
--One of the Known Issues is musical cues, so I'm assuming music is unfinished. The lack of music in many scenes was conspicuous (although there are a few where silence would be appropriate). The lack of music/sound on the title screen is also kind of disconcerting. (I never even realized how much my brain is trained to expect to hear something.)
Bugs:
--The first time Reme appears, the boat in the background jumps.
--At the end of the docks scene with Salima, when the background transitions the transparency shows through.
--There's a typo after choosing to find post office: "dscend along both sides of the foyer"
--With Salima at the beach, starting with "as I approach a tree, about seven or eight meters away", a bright pixel appears in the upper center. It persists while the screen turns red until zoomed in ("Wh-what are you doing?"). (You know, I find myself very curious what caused a single pixel to go awry. )
--A couple pages of text overflow: when discussing the prescription for the cat ("Is he sick?"), when she gets home and is painting ("Letting out a sigh due to my broken concentration"), and some other points when talking to Karl (I didn't write down the lines).
Other thoughts I had as a played through:
--When we see Reme, the description says he "continues excitedly," but the way the line "Hey, I've been trying to get ahold of you..." is voice-acted doesn't sound that way. I like the way it was acted -- glad, but tinged with an intriguing concern/uncertainty... But it didn't quite jibe with the word "excitedly."
--The line "constant sound of gulls" is definitely in need of sound effects.
--When everything turns red around Salima, it's a neat visual. (Although I feel like there should be a sound effect to accompany it.)
--I feel like Elena's "verbal tick" should be audible. Not sure if that's doable as this point, but it's something I made note of. ^_^
--The first time at the flower shop after ringing the bell, Eva's sprite flashing for a second seemed like a bug. Maybe some up-down movement would help?
--I like the behind-the-counter sprites.
--near-by = nearby
--When Nina comes to the door with a crowbar, seeing her sprite gave me the impression that she came into the room. But then she asks to come in.
--With Salima at the beach, the zooming in with her sprite staying the same size is really cool. It seems okay for some of this scene to have no music.
--When talking about the fire, I think some fire imagery would be appropriate. Not necessarily a full background, but maybe some sort of overlay? Some more animation in this scene wouldn't hurt, either.
--I love the animation of the Salima sprite zipping out and in. Cool sound effect, too.
--I also love the animation of Nina drunk. The tilting to the side then correcting herself is perfect.
--After going out then returning to the boarding house, it's described as being very dark, with only a couple windows lit. This contradicts the background, in which all windows are lit.
--The music for this scene is slow and subdued, slowly building... which is good for the beginning, but once the cat is found, something more frantic should be playing. (The later part of this track is a bit more appropriate, though the faster part would need to be on loop.) As it is now, the mood doesn't seem right.
--Aw, Salima looks so cute with her hair down. (Though she looks cute with her hair up, as well.)
--Hey, when did the main menu background change?? Stealthy...
And that's as far as I've gotten. I hope this has been helpful. I'm happy to have backed this project.